My girlfriend Sarah broke it off with me. I’m pretty heartbroken about it, I thought she was the one. Sarah doesn’t want to date a guy with a broken dick, and she didn’t outright say it, but we both know that’s why she doesn’t want to screw around anymore.
My Uncle Paul is a urologist, but he’s the top urologist in the country, and he’s a huge deal in my hometown Chicago. I’m having an issue where I need to see a doctor like him, and I figure since he’s my uncle he’ll keep my visit to him on the down-low. I still have to pay him, but he promised to give me a break.
I see my beautiful mother on the couch and I ask her, “can I borrow your car?” She lifts up, “sure, where are we going?” Mom is so used to me bringing her around on errands, to appointments, and even out with friends, she’s a cool mom.. mot like those stuffy, bloated high-waisted soccer moms that you’re used to seeing. She shines her smile at me and doesn’t buy my whole “gotta hang out with the guys and do guy stuff” line. I hate to lie to her so I give her a half truth, “I’m going to hang out with Uncle Paul.”
Mom raised her eyebrow, and I knew she was suspicious. Her brother doesn’t hang around our family much, he’s all about business first, family second. Mom hates that he has a new hottie girlfriend every week, she thinks his collection of sports cars are ridiculous, and his Penthouse Condo downtown is “a bit much.” She’s got a way of wiggling the truth out of me and I confess to her the most embarrassing secret of my entire life. “I cannot keep an erection during sex,” and her jaw drops in shock and pity, “it’s why Sarah broke it off with me.” I see the gears turning in my mother’s head, she thinks she can solve every problem, especially if it involves me. She tells me that all I need to do is find a woman who will build my confidence with patience and love. Mom’s beautiful lips part, and she tells me, “close your eyes.”
I hate to think that she’ll touch me, would she? I mean.. a part of me really wants her to, but I know it’s wrong. I search my brain to tell me what to do, what’s right? It’s my mom telling me to do something for her, and I should obey her, you should always obey your mother.. but oh God, would she touch me inappropriately? I don’t think she has that in her. We’ve always been close, but not “that kind of close.” My mom is stunning and if I wasn’t her son, I would give in to whatever she wanted, but it’s not right by law, by nature, to.. “CLOSE YOUR EYES,” she interrupts my inner-voice with her strict instruction, and oh God– I do it. I closed my eyes and waited with the hairs standing up on the back of my neck, my pumping through my body, my senses were all heightened with anticipation.
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